OK, here is some randomness...
If you want some wicked traxx, check these babies out, real fucking good to write a business plan to...'scuse my language. And yes, this is all trance for those of you who know me... Enjoy the business plan notes too...
LCM - Forgotten (Acues and Elitist Remix)
-Hell yeah, the manager can have 70k per year!
Ronald van Gelderen - Brightness (Original mix)
-Nah, make that 90k per year plus bonus!
Saint Rush - Pyro (Original mix)
-And a car.
RNM - Stargliding (Original mix)
-Got a partner? they can have a car too.
Se Ra Phic - Sunset Rose (Original mix)
-make it 100k.
Black Pearl - Bounty Island (DJ Shah's San Antonio Harbour mix)
-and a big joint.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Randomness...
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Stupid Customers
Here are some customer comments that I can recall from my former job, it was in the technology sector, and I worked for a leading consumer electronics brand. I don't want to get anyone in trouble so I'll change the details... and not tell you who it was, I like their new PS3 though, it's sweet. Doh.
One
Customer " Do you sell 15 gigawatt I-pods?"
Two
Customer "Do you sell I-pods?"
Staff "No Sir, that's an apple product"
Customer "Yeah, but do you sell them?"
Staff ???
Three
Customer " Do you sell Laptops?"
Staff "Yes Sir, We do"
Customer "Well? where are they?" (Aggrivated)
Staff "Right behind you sir"
Customer "Uh..."
Four
Staff "That's awesome, it looks so real!"
Customer "Sorry?"
Staff "That cap with fake bird shit on it"
The customer goes red and pulls his cap off examining the white toothpaste/mayonnaise looking blob that is dripping down from the rim, he looks at the staff memeber and folds up his cap, stuffing it in to his back pocket, turns and leaves quickly.
Staff "um... hey guys!"
One
Customer " Do you sell 15 gigawatt I-pods?"
Two
Customer "Do you sell I-pods?"
Staff "No Sir, that's an apple product"
Customer "Yeah, but do you sell them?"
Staff ???
Three
Customer " Do you sell Laptops?"
Staff "Yes Sir, We do"
Customer "Well? where are they?" (Aggrivated)
Staff "Right behind you sir"
Customer "Uh..."
Four
Staff "That's awesome, it looks so real!"
Customer "Sorry?"
Staff "That cap with fake bird shit on it"
The customer goes red and pulls his cap off examining the white toothpaste/mayonnaise looking blob that is dripping down from the rim, he looks at the staff memeber and folds up his cap, stuffing it in to his back pocket, turns and leaves quickly.
Staff "um... hey guys!"
Sunday, March 25, 2007
An afternoon quicky
"I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons."
Douglas Adams.
"In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love; they had five hundred years of democracy and peace and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock."
Orson Welles.
"The first rule of business is: Do other men for they would do you."
Charles Dickens.
"We didn't actually overspend our budget. The allocation simply fell short of our expenditure." Keith Davis.
"Today's payslip has more deductions than a Sherlock Holmes novel."
Raymond Cvikota.
"To make a long story short, there's nothing like having a boss walk in."
Doris Lilly.
"I want a one-armed economist so that the guy could never make a statement and then say 'on the other hand…"
Harry Truman.
"When I was young I used to think that wealth and power would bring me happiness. I was right."
Gahan Wilson.
"When I asked my accountant if anything could get me out of this mess I am in now he thought for a long time and said, 'Yes, death would help'."
Robert Morley.
"A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error."
Dennis Miller.
Douglas Adams.
"In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love; they had five hundred years of democracy and peace and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock."
Orson Welles.
"The first rule of business is: Do other men for they would do you."
Charles Dickens.
"We didn't actually overspend our budget. The allocation simply fell short of our expenditure." Keith Davis.
"Today's payslip has more deductions than a Sherlock Holmes novel."
Raymond Cvikota.
"To make a long story short, there's nothing like having a boss walk in."
Doris Lilly.
"I want a one-armed economist so that the guy could never make a statement and then say 'on the other hand…"
Harry Truman.
"When I was young I used to think that wealth and power would bring me happiness. I was right."
Gahan Wilson.
"When I asked my accountant if anything could get me out of this mess I am in now he thought for a long time and said, 'Yes, death would help'."
Robert Morley.
"A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error."
Dennis Miller.
Difficult Employee Articles
Ideas to help you when you're considering violence as an option!
http://www.apesma.asn.au/women/career/dealing_with_difficult_people.asp
http://www.consultantsconsultant.com.au/article_difficult_staff.htm
http://www.smallbusiness.co.uk/5.6/human-resources/guides/24845/dealing-with-difficult-employees.thtml
http://www.btob.co.nz/story_0005615.shtml
http://www.hrinz.org.nz/Site/HR_Info/Guides/Dealing_with_Difficult_People.aspx
Innocence (Immaturity) vs Professionalism
I remember a staff member that I had, this person was the paragon of cuteness.
Pushing 30, they had colour coded their entire life to the colour pink. Not so bad.
They liked to run around and hug staff and pretend that they were still at school.
Cute. Yes.
Professional when helping customers. Fuck No.
When approached about this behaviour and told that there is a time for everything, and that they should perhaps put themselves in the customers shoes, they cried.
(I rolled my eyes)
Everyone loved this person but all agreed that she probably hadn't developed the life skills that many had developed. This I found out from the grapevine.
As a result I sat down with this person again and asked them to look at their plan for life and what they wanted to achieve. The answers, though personally relevant to that person, did nothing but make want to beat some sense in to them. that's terrible, I know.
It reminded me of a past girlfriend who just wanted to get pregnant and be a mother. Lovely yes, but not for me.
Eventually, we managed to work out some goals for this person and as management I gave her direction on what she might do to gain experience.
She eventually left my organisation and I saw her the other day working for a large company in customer services, she was hugging a staff member.
Innocence is nice. Immaturity isn't.
Maybe I'm just a prick.
Pushing 30, they had colour coded their entire life to the colour pink. Not so bad.
They liked to run around and hug staff and pretend that they were still at school.
Cute. Yes.
Professional when helping customers. Fuck No.
When approached about this behaviour and told that there is a time for everything, and that they should perhaps put themselves in the customers shoes, they cried.
(I rolled my eyes)
Everyone loved this person but all agreed that she probably hadn't developed the life skills that many had developed. This I found out from the grapevine.
As a result I sat down with this person again and asked them to look at their plan for life and what they wanted to achieve. The answers, though personally relevant to that person, did nothing but make want to beat some sense in to them. that's terrible, I know.
It reminded me of a past girlfriend who just wanted to get pregnant and be a mother. Lovely yes, but not for me.
Eventually, we managed to work out some goals for this person and as management I gave her direction on what she might do to gain experience.
She eventually left my organisation and I saw her the other day working for a large company in customer services, she was hugging a staff member.
Innocence is nice. Immaturity isn't.
Maybe I'm just a prick.
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